Self Love

Today one of my friends tagged me in one of those chain things on instagram. You know, the type like “post a picture of yourself and tag ten other beautiful women! #SelfLove !!!” Or whatever. I didnt. You know why? Because the world doesnt need more “self love”! It really doesnt. Screw self love. Its one thing for me to see young self conscious teenage girls do this, who are still struggling with their identity as a person and as a woman, but im seeing full grown ass women share this thing too and it makes me sad to see. Your identity doesnt come from your perception of how you look or from how other people see you, and self love isnt the answer to a happy life nor is it a cure for anxiety, self loathing, or general self consciousness. Ok? Jesus is the answer. I really want to repost it but with the caption “My identity doesnt come from my perxeption of self nor from how others see me, my identity is in Jesus and though i want to respect others and myself with how i present myself to the world, whether that presentation is perceived as beautiful or not by those around me is beside the point. I am me, and I am im Christ.” But i feel like thats really aelf righteous.

Sometimes I hear people say “ex cetera” instead of “et cetera” and I hear the difference but I don’t say anything because it’s not a big deal. Same with words like “irregardless” (which isn’t a word) and “expresso” But what REALLY grinds my gears is when people talk about Joel Osteen.

Basically every person I know does this and I honestly do not understand why. They say “Joel Olsteen” THERES NO L IN HIS SURNAME GUYS. ITS OSTEEN. I don’t understand why this is such a common mistake but like everybody does it. My husband, the pastor, all our friends, people online even spell his name wrong to include the L they for some reason think is there. Is this a case of mass hallucination? Am I immune to dillusion? Is it a conspiracy? MAYBE. It certainly would explain a lot.

Drawing sucks

Hi.

Long time no see.

I know what you're all thinking: "Who has the audacity to abandon her blog for years and come back like nothing ever happened?" The answer to that question should be obvious!

ME!

Anyway.

Here’s the thing about being an artist. Everybody who is even the tiniest bit not quite as talented as you assumes that you’re way more talented than you are. They’re like “oooo can you draw me??” Or “oh I’ll hire you to illustrate my comic!” But what they don’t understand is that like, my talent is suuuuuper selective. I’m good at drawing what I want to draw. I like drawing eyes, I like drawing long flowing hair, high heels, a few cartoon animals, and that’s pretty much it. Everything else I’m mediocre at best. But people don’t know that, they see how great my cartoon dog is and assume I can illustrate a comic. I cannot. I can barely draw a face once, let alone draw it multiple times in different expressions and angles and lightings and have it look even sorta like the same person.

My husband (wow a lot has happened since last I updated this blog) and a few of his friends are writing a comic and through my husband’s puppy eyes that I simply am unable to resist, I agreed to draw up some rough sketches of their ideas. Ugh the worst of it is that I used to draw a lot, back in the height of my artistic career, but I don’t draw hardly at all anymore. I just don’t have time! Anytime I’m sitting down long enough to put a writing utensil to paper, I’ve got my baby (seriously, a LOT has happened) in my lap so I can’t. I guess I could make it more of a priority  in my life, but most of my artistic pursuits have been painting, which may seem similar to drawing but it’s totally completely different and not the same at all.

I feel like I’m more talented at painting than I ever was at drawing. With drawing i get an idea of what I want to draw and 99% of the time it doesn’t turn out how I wanted it. It’s usually ok anyway after changing the plan countless times and cutting corners and cheating, and everybody looks at it and says it’s great, but what they don’t see is the hours of frustration and resignation in the drawing. That’s what I see. You see a picture of a pretty girl wearing a nice dress and I see the feet I erased a thousand times before giving up and just covering them with a longer dress. I see the eyes that I wanted to be looking at the viewer but I couldn’t get them to match so I resigned myself to making them point sideways. I see the staff I wanted to put in her hand but couldn’t get the arm right, and the background that never will happen because why do I even try at this point? It’s frustrating.

With painting I can get an idea of what I want and even if it doesn’t turn out how I wanted it still turns out amazing. When I make mistakes, instead of the mistakes turning into disproportioned feet or a rock that looks like a deflated beach ball, my mistakes kinda make the painting better. Accidentally making a sunset red instead of orange doesn’t ruin anything. And these paintings can be hung on my walls, or given as gifts. They impress people even more than my drawing, even though I’ve practiced far less. I only have 10 colors in the cheapest brand Walmart had available, a few paintbrushes, and some cardboard instead of canvas, but it’s enjoyable and rather than being frustrating and disappointing like drawing, it’s satisfying and makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something.


Ok I’m done here.

-Beatrice

Salt Water Taffy

I decided I needed to learn how to make salt water taffy. So I quickly found a recipe online, printed it out, and went about making it. I had to cook it to 265 degrees exactly. Now, it's sorta hard to see exact degrees on our candy thermometer, as its only marked every five degrees, so I found the approximate spot, and cooked it to that. It was hard candy when it cooled, not taffy. I dropped it, and it shattered! SHATTERED! Taffy doesn't shatter!  Now, orange flavored hard candy would still be cool though, so I stuck a shard into my mouth. It. Was. Salt. Salt. Salt. Salt. Gross.
I had wanted salt water taffy... not bricks of orange salt.

So, this afternoon, with a few modifications.

 TAFFY WAS BORN!!!!
Beautiful, no?

Last Donut

The last donut of the dozen. Gone. We shall miss it greatly.

The other ME

This is the other Me, not her (she'll have her own account to publish from soon, so don't worry about being too confused for long).*
I am Rachel!


I will not attempt to draw myself as Vicky did, but will eventually maybe get around to drawing a self-portrait, which will be a hundred times more artistic than Vicky's.  For now though you should know that I too have a large nose, ears, and a perfect smile that would warm the lifeless hearts of Harry Potter, Snape, Voldemort, Darth Vader, Neelix, Chakotay, and Captain Janeway altogether with just one small quiver of my cheek.


1. I like to swim, read, write, draw, bathe, and breathe. Just like Vicky. Plus eating, I really love eating.

2. I have no job to speak of at all at this time. Nor do I currently volunteer for any wonderful humanitarian place.

3. I am also a quiet one who is a little bit off my rocker. Except when I'm the loud one who's completely off my rocker. Not only do I talk to things, but things talk back. 0.o

4. I have neither ADHD, ADD, or OCD, but most of my family does (especially Vicky). Thus I am provided with constant amusement.


5. The only thing in this entire world better than SUMMER, is fall, autumn, the crazy, cold, rainy, windy, overcast, wet, brown, and orange season. I have recently rediscovered my love of autumn, after thinking for several months that summer was amazing. I now remember my true feelings (grabs a mug of hot apple cider and watches with amusement as a certain OCD sister can't find gloves, shoes, and complains of the muddy pawprints on her jacket).

6. I hate vacuum cleaners. 

6. Vacuum cleaners hate me.

7. I like finding lists that people leave lying around and scribbling out items on them.

8. my favorite number is 38 (the number 8, and anything related to it are usually the color green)

9. green>red

Live Long and Prosper, my dear friends. 

-Rachel out

*Vicky now has her own account to publish from. She's Beatrice.

All about Me

Let me start by telling about myself:
Hi! I'm Vicky. This is me trying to wave with short chubby arms:

Above is my attempt to draw a realistic representation of me complete with large ears, nose, mouth, and freezing cold feet. (You can't see it, but my toes are blueish.) I'm also wearing pajamas.

Below are some major points that define me:

1. I like to swim, read, write, draw, bathe, and breathe. 

2. I volunteer at a local hospital as a transporter, which means I discharge patients. While working, I let others do all the talking which often times means there are a lot of awkward silences that I take all the credit for. 

3. Most of my friends know me as the quiet one who doesn't move much and is a bit off. The rest of them know better. I'm not quiet, I wiggle like a maniac and I'm more than "a bit" off. And by "off" I mean off my rocker, insane, nonsensical, weird, strange, abnormal, odd, crazy, mental, mad, retarded, schizophrenic, and/or otherwise impaired. I talk to things.

4. I have ADHD, and OCD, which might seem a bit contradictory, but it provides constant amusement for me seeing which side of my mental impairment will be triumphant this time.

5. Dogs are the mutated embodiment of the perfect human mixed with a hobbit. They love everything, tolerate anything, eat healthy, are selfless, and are only saddened by the sadness of others. If every human were like dogs, the world would be better and would probably smell like bones and old tennis shoes.

6. Cell phones are a necessary evil. They disrupt, disturb, deafen, distract, detract, delay, disconnect and are all together despicable things. They're also nearly impossible to hear through. However, they are needed, which I admit to despite my strong feelings of vengeance towards them. grr

7. I like numbering things. It makes me happy. So do shapes, llamas. and the word "dramatic."

9. I hate the number 8. I can't process it. It's like it just never goes through my ear or eye all the way. I also have troubles saying the words "Cash register," "drawer," and "turquoise," despite the fact that I am a self-proclaimed Master of Tongue Twisters.

10. Last and least, I have an important announcement for you!!! It's very exciting!! Drum roll please.....YOU HAVE REACHED THE END! Congrats! Here, have a cookie.